Chocolate.

     Dear Mama,
     Today there was church, and I'll be honest, I didn't want to go. I was tired, and I felt... well. "eh" about the whole thing. But I got up, got dressed, and got into the van to go. At Sunday school, I ate a blueberry muffin instead of the chocolate one, because of my whole... "trying to avoid sweets" thing, and accepted Red Beard's invitation to sit next to him. The Ap's came and sat next to me, and we three talked for a bit. Red Beard looked at his empty styrofoam cup and said, "Well that's sad. My milk is gone." I took his cup from him without saying a word and went to go refill it. It was an easy transfer, so I didn't think anyone had noticed, but as I left the circle of fold up chairs, I heard Red Leader say, "Wow, Red Beard, why don't you go ask her to make you a sandwich too!" And the sandwich jokes escalated from there. I brought his milk back, and apologized for not bringing him two bagels with creme cheese in the middle, since that was the closest thing to a sandwich available.

     In Sunday school we talked about the government. So. That was exciting.

     It ended, and I realized Braids was there. She hadn't been at church yet, or at youth group (which she had previously been one of the leaders of) this semester. I had run into her a handful of times over the semester, and she seemed sad. See, the thing about Braids is, she (normally) is the definition of joyful. Her love of Jesus is truly inspiring; it flows from everything she says and does. She's a beautiful, happy, energetic person.
     But this semester, she seemed... heavy. She needed to talk, but she isn't the kind of person to talk about herself unless you ask. So, I pulled her aside and asked. Her eyes filled up with tears when she said, "No, I'm fine, really. Jesus is good, I'm just... not. But I'll be okay." "Braids, what's wrong?" "It would take hours to explain everything." Most everyone had left the room at this point. I touched her shoulder and asked, "Well, have you talked to anyone about at least some of it?" She shook her head.
   I sat down with her, and asked her to just start somewhere. For the most part, she just felt lonely. Her family moved back to another country, so she was alone in America. Along with that, she is the kind of person that gives until they have nothing left, and with all the groups she's involved herself in, she's exhausted from listening to people talk, caring for them, praying for them, bearing their burdens. Several friendships are with manipulative people who give absolutely nothing back, and guilt her if she isn't always available to them. All of that, plus an extremely large homework load has taken its toll, and she's lost some of that pure joy in seeking God. That was taking a toll on her as well, because, like I said, Braids is a happy person who truly finds joy in Christ. She was missing that... light, happy joy.
     She ended this conversation by saying, "And I hate this weather! Why is it so cold? I miss warmth so much..." I knew from a previous conversation that her love language was gifts, and I was pretty sure one of the things she needed the most was to just laugh and let some of the stress go.
     As we ended this conversation, Flywheel came in. He'd been one of the last to leave the room from Sunday School. "Hey" I said, "how much of the service have we missed?" "Oh... I don't know. I didn't go up." Braids sat up a bit, "why not?" "Well, because I've been outside, praying for you. Are you doing better?" Seems I wasn't the only one who'd noticed Braids' change. "Yeah" she said, "I really am." "Okay, good." He said, "Well if you need anything, just say so." He left the room.

     I then crafted a plan to make Braids laugh, and to give her a little bit of the warmth she'd been missing. After church, I went up to Flywheel, "Hey" I said, "Can I ask you something?" I told him my plan, (which required a trip to Walmart.)
     He drove The Ap's and I there after lunch with our group from church. I decided I'd turn up the heat really high in my room, and tell Braids (who's agreed to come to the dorm for a bit in the afternoon) to bring shorts. I'd decorate with cheap fake flowers and streamers. I'd play some fun upbeat songs on my radio, and make tropical fruit dipped in chocolate for a snack. (I figured I'd let today be a vacation from my attempts to avoid sweets. It was for a good cause! And though I hated the thought of it, it would just be weird to make her eat it on her own.... I know. It was a real sacrifice. But it was one I felt I had to make...) I'd also save some of the flowers and attach them to bobby pins to put in our hair. I got her some loaf cake, because I know she loves bread but there wasn't any of the kind she said she liked. I got two different kinds of chocolate- milk and white- because I didn't know which one she would like better. For fruit, I made sure to buy things I know me and my roommates would eat as well (since Braids and I definitely wouldn't eat all of it during the afternoon) I also thought the flowers would add something nice to the room, and if I decorated well, they could just stay up! The streamers were 93 cents... so... I figured that was an easy splurge. Flywheel had the idea to buy streamers the colors of her country's flag. We were set.
     I spent an hour getting ready. I told Braids when to show up, what to bring (shorts...), and I was so excited! I'd decided to be frugal and buy a whole pineapple rather than the pre-cut bits, (it was a couple dollars cheaper, and I got more pineapple than I would have if I'd just gotten the cut up bits) and boy, was that a pain in the butt to cut. My knives were not made for that heavy duty stuff! But finally, the process was over. I cut up two bananas, and set out about 8 strawberries, and saved the rest for when I wanted fruit later on in the week.
     I set the freshly cut fruit out nicely on a plate, and had just put the chocolate in the microwave start when my phone went off...

     Braids was getting sick. Her roommate had mono. She was really sorry, but after homework she didn't think she could come. She asked if we could hang out another day. I told her it was okay and we could definitely reschedule.
     Not gonna lie, I was really disappointed...
   
     But, then I figured, "why waste all of this?" By the time Braids felt better, the fruit would probably be bad, and it was already all chopped up and half the chocolate has melted. So, I decided The Ap's and I would just have a nice treat! We'd have fruit dipped in chocolate for dinner! The Other had gone home for the weekend, so it was just us two. Plus, this would allow me more time to work on my homework.
    I dipped all the fruit, found out that mixing milk in the chocolate does not make it creamier, made a bar of chocolate from the slightly over-milked chocolate, and finished dipping the pineapples in a new batch of creamy, sweet darkness.

     I put it all in the fridge and started on some homework. After about 45 minutes, The Ap's got the hardened fruit dipped in deliciousness, and we ate almost all of it while laughing at, tearing up to, and sometimes just scoffing at wedding proposal videos on YouTube.

     Occasionally we would even break out into Beyoncé's song, "All the single ladies"! (well, just the first lines, "All the single ladies, all the single ladies, all the single ladies, all the single ladies, whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa, whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa!" I know. The lyrics are about as deep as my love for itchy clothing.)

     All that's to say, the single life is treating me well! And I can make chocolate covered fruit in my dorm. It's been a successful day.

    With Love,
     Me